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A little light hearted poetry. 
 

Becoming a parent.

A poem By me.  

 

We zoomed to hospital in a rush,

I had a desperate urge to push

A picnic for the support team,

Was all I thought I would need

We only got through the door,

I almost dropped onto the floor

A baby came out of my vagina,

Who’d have thought it could get wider?

I was euphoric- it was easy!

Or did the gas just make me queasy?

A nurse dressed and fed the baby,

I was real tired not just lazy!

The bath at hospital was amazing,

Was it made for easy urinating?

Eventually we passed all the tests,

And set off home hoping for the best!

Who knew giving birth was the easy part?

No one warns you it’s just the start!

So much more lies ahead,

Some of it fills me with dread!

Teaching them right from wrong,

The birds, the bees, the drinking songs!

I knew it would be a challenge,

I really hope we more than manage🤞

 

fricken Kids

Another poem by me

 

That’s it, I’ve had it, it’s all too much,

No more tv or crisps before lunch,

 

They rule the roost, run riot the lot,

We all know we’d like to wallop a bott 🤣

 

“We want frubes for lunch, nuggets n chips for tea”

Winge all you want it’s fruit and veg from me!

 

“Eat some dinner, iPad off the table!”

The chaos makes me increasingly unstable.

 

I love them deeply they know it’s true,

But please can you hurry to put on a shoe!

 

The bath and bedtime routine,always a chore,

I breath a sigh of relief when I close their doors 😁👍

                               

 

My guilty pleasure.

A poem by me 🤪

 

You have no voice but you call my name,

I hear it loudly again and again.

 

It’s not breakfast, lunch or dinner,

But your determined to make me a sinner.

 

I get on the treadmill for hours on end,

If you were a person you’d be a 🔔 end.

 

Your smooth and rich but trapped in a jar,

Really I’d like you to fill my bra 😳

 

I have an obsession - yes it’s true,

Would life be better without you?

I know I need to get to grips,

A moment on the lips, lifetime on the hips!

 

One day I might give you up,

Until that day comes... your my love.

 

*dedicated to a particular jar of hazelnut spread. 🤣🤷‍♀️🤦‍♀️

 

              

 


 

In my dreams. This was my first poem. It’s took me a while to post it 🥰😌😇 for Hollie x

When a feather floats my way,

Or a robin saves my day..

It makes me think of you it’s true,

A blond beauty with eyes so blue..

 

I think about you everyday,

Since the moment you were took away..

But you come to me in my dreams,

Those nights go to quickly so it seems..

 

I join you in surreal surroundings,

Just like our youth we know no bounding..

Then I wake and I wish I hadn’t,

I wanted to see you I’m so maddened..

 

I hope you’ll come again tonight,

Your glimmer makes my dreams so bright..

You make me wait for months on end.

 

But when I see you- your my best friend 😊 Till you visit again. X

19 days ago

                               

 

 

Time to pause.

A poem by me. (Came to me while walking today 😁👍)

 

I like to walk.

I love to talk.

I always think.

Some say I stink!😳

 

It clears my mind.

Its therapy I find.

Out in fresh air.

I stop and stare.

 

Bird songs so clear.

Memories so dear.

Moments pass.

I always dash.

 

It’s good to pause.

Sort your thoughts.

Gain perspective.

New directives.

 

Set some goals.

Don’t make them small. ................... It’s good to pause. 👍😁

               

                               

2020 resolutions.

A poem by me.

Happy new year to one and all,

2019 it’s been a ball!

Into a new decade we all go,

A year older no wiser though.

 

New Years Resolutions we all set,

Never sticking to it - a sure bet.

I’ll drink more water and less wine,

Gin and tonic with slimline!

 

No more cheese Christmas is over,

I can’t get into my pullover.

Jeans so tight I’ve resorted to jeggings,

one more cake -can't get a leg in.

 

I’ll go for a run, join the gym,

Slimming world I’m booked in!

Good times, sad times it’s all been said,

But the best times lie ahead.

 

It’s a new year and a new me,

Firstly though - take down the tree 🌲

 

                               

Ageing Birthdays.  

A poem By me (on my birthday 🤣🎉)

 

When your younger and filled with life,

A birthday fills you with delight.

 

In your twenties it’s amazing,

Party till the suns ablazing.

 

Shots and trebles it’s your staple,

Dancing on any table.

 

Special offers and free shots here,

It didn’t fill you with the fear.

 

Puking in your taxi home,

Always losing your cell phone!

 

Waking up in last nights clothes,

Wondering how you got home.

 

It was all normal and such fun,

I never thought I’d become a nun.

 

As I’ve got older in my thirties,

I’ve tamed it down I’m not so flirty.

 

Late nights fill me with dread,

I’d rather be drinking in my bed.

 

I’m resigned to feeling boring,

Listening to my husband snoring.

 

Early nights are my new crazy,

I don’t like waking feeling Hazy.

 

Pass the wine put a movie on,

Until the next night out I’m done 🤣👍

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